why is it you remind me
how much I have missed in life and
am missing now in life...
it is torture...
and reminds me how good I am
at pressing buttons to make the pain go away...
so that I can wear the face of unmasked truths
you remind me of the forgottens...
laying with my head on your chest
listening to your heartbeat
as we wait to go to sleep
wearing your socks because
i pretend i can't find mine
shaving my legs (when I had hair)
with your razor even though
I know you hate that,
tasting your pinky
to dot the eye
on the end of my day
watching you flirt at the party
with other women and men and children
knowing that you will come home to
giving you a bath
sharing your shower
all this I planned to forget
slammed in the closet of
my wannabes
making love with mothballs
what bicycle horse
has tricked me into
to yearn
to learn

good night and good morrow
the vast ocean
causes me sorrow

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